Monday 15 August 2011

The Perfect Guy (based on "The List")

DISCLAIMER:
If you're a woman that I know, this is in no way meant for you. I swear it!

So, The Most Eligible Dallas premiered on Bravo tonight, and since I had nothing better to do with my time, I decided to give it a watch. There was this one girl, Courtney, looking for love and the perfect man to give it to her. Now her idea of  "the perfect man" was precise list of characteristics that went a little something like this:

  • He should be tall with sort of JFK Jr. shade hair.
  • He should definitely be Southern, probably from here (Texas) but is just returning because he went out of state for school
  • he should have a dog with a manly name, like I dunno, Butch or something
  • He should wear boots, yes definitely needs to wear boots, but he should also be able to wear suits as well. That way he can look like he's going to ranch but he can also look like he's a GQ model
...and the list went on.

Sounds a little bit ridiculous, doesn't it? It would seem like she's pre-ordering the man from the heavens and after he's done baking just right, he'll drop *plop* right into her lap.

But Courtney isn't the only one with a list is she? Everyone has a list; hell I have a fucking list. We update it from time to time, as we get older, as we mature, adding favorable qualities, subtracting the ones we no longer care for and so on and so forth. We NEVER leave our list behind, because we never know just when the oven timer might go off and our Adonis will baked, boxed and ready to go. The difference between Courtney and I? I got a grip. I've accepted, since probably the age of thirteen that we don't live in a perfect world and if Santa and Tooth Fairy do not exist, then the 'perfect guy' has to be a myth too. So while he might be taller than six feet, thus ensuring that he towers over me (yes, I am six feet tall) and while he may have a perfect set of teeth, he'll probably also be the laziest man on the face of the earth who just happens to like the smell of his own dirty socks. No guy is ever gonna meet all the criteria that we've set out in our minds for him because, well, unfortunately there isn't an online store that we can go to customize the ideal one.

Now let's be clear, I am not saying that the list does not have its merits. It's a good way to pinpoint the essential qualities that you want in a man, but ladies, the fluff is unnecessary. We have to bear in mind that men are human beings and as such, they will be riddled with flaws. We must also remember, and this is most important, we are not perfect either, so it is unfair of us to expect perfection from our partners.

The key is compromise. One cannot expect to find love in the same manner that they shop for groceries, because while you're busy checking items off your list, Mr. Just-Right-For-You may just walk on by, only to be snatched up by someone who isn't so busy obsessing with whether or not he's perfect. Do not become a slave to the list because quite frankly, you can't cuddle up at night, talk to, or build a future with a list.

The Pink Duchess
xoxo

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